Ichi-nii Knows Best
by OnyxKatana
Summary: An older brother's comments on a spitfire of a younger sister and an ice-cube of a Juubantai Taicho. HitsuKarin. IchiHime if you use a microscope.
It's true. Big brothers are born first so that they can look out for their younger sister. Or sisters. And no matter what kind of punk-delinquent reputation I had built, Karin and Yuzu were among the few people exempt from it. Because I would be damned if I didn't give it my all and then some to be the best brother I could be for those two.

Yuzu was easy to please. She was the youngest in the house, and all it took was an acknowlegdement and maybe a hair-ruffle and the job was done. I got a dazzling smile in return and her eyes would light up. Sometimes, I had the suspicion that she had a bit of a brother-complex, or maybe she was just oddly attached to me. Sure, there were those times when she would be angry or annoyed and give me either the cold shoulder, or cold food, or both. However, those times were extremely rare. And a bit of apologizing and coddling usually got the job done.

Karin was a whole different story. A fiery little tomboy. If Yuzu was attached to me, then Karin looked up to me, not that she would ever admit it. It had taken me an awfully long time, but I eventually reached the conclusion that Karin, intentionally or not, taken after me A LOT. She had always been loud and brash and rambunctious and a proper little monster, but the scowling and the 'hit-first-ask-later' persona was probably my fault.

And as stupid and unbelievable as it sounds, Karin was more attached to me than Yuzu would ever be, although in completely different ways.

Karin was a private person. She never believed in great big displays of emotion, of any kind. And she preferred getting absolutely filthy chasing after a ball, rather than dressing up and looking prim and neat and glamorous and delicate. That was one of the reasons for her being close to her "Ichi-nii". More than a few afternoons had been spent playing one-on-one soccer, and then facing Yuzu's wrath when we tramped home way too late, identical grins on our faces. I had been introduced to all of her friends at some point (and explained to each of those boys, in no uncertain terms, what hell I was capable of raising, if any of them even thought about pulling anything funny with Karin).

When she came back for the first time with bruises and scrapes, after beating up her first bully, Yuzu had been angry and had given her a lecture, before helping Dad treat Karin's wounds. And I, like the responsible older brother, had later pulled Karin aside, and given her a short demonstration on how to hit someone, without causing damage to yourself. Needless to say, Karin and I had a decent amount of "never-tell-Yuzu" secrets.

* * *

However, there comes a time when every elder brother is faced with his worst nightmare. And me? I never even saw it coming. I had expected something, but not quite what I got. I had expected to be dealing with whatever twerp thought he was even passable to date Yuzu. It never even crossed my mind that I would have to glare someone who was convinced he could date Karin into submission.

No, don't get me wrong. I knew there would be a line of idiots for Yuzu. She was pretty even as a kid, and I knew that she would grow up to be downright beautiful. Honey-blonde hair and wide chestnut eyes, along with some rather appealing curves as she grew into them. I had no problem with scaring away any potential suitors, because I expected it, and was prepared for it. As simple as that.

Karin was a different case. While I knew perfectly well that Karin could be a heartbreaker when she grew up, with her dark hair and ebony eyes, she never bothered with dressing up, and hair and makeup and all that girly stuff. And I knew that the girl was perfectly capable of thrashing any boy who so much as looked at her funny (I also knew she had no qualms about thrashing the guy). Although, I had nothing to worry about during the early years anyway. She played so much with the guys, that most them considered her 'one of the group'. And Karin wasn't the attention seeking kind anyway, to purposely try to impress some idiot. So, I thought I had it pretty easy on that front.

Besides, she had once confided to her "Ichi-nii" something that I believed would be my trump card in my mission to 'make sure the idiots stay off my sisters'.

* * *

I was decently surprised when Karin showed up with Hitsugaya Toshiro, of all people, at home. The logical part of my brain told me that they'd probably sent the kid here on some assignment, and Rukia or someone might have told him to camp out at my house for a couple days. The fact that Karin knew him didn't send up much of a red flag. I just assumed they might have crossed paths on some prior assignment, or maybe earlier in the day. Besides, I knew that the Juubantai Taicho was too much of a stickler for rules, and an ice-cube to boot. So, I didn't think much of the event. I heard Yuzu squeal about Karin bringing home a boyfriend, and both Karin and Toshiro vehemently denying it.

'See? Nothing to worry about.'

I decided to make sure that Toshiro understood what the situation was anyway. It took little to no effort to narrow my eyes, scowl slightly and send a glare in his direction, with a simple, but threatening-

"Toshiro, what the hell do you think you're doing?"

The tick on his forehead was enough proof for me that yes, Toshiro got the message loud and clear, and that no, there was nothing going on with that ice-cube and my sister.

* * *

It was a good five or so years later when I next saw the white-haired Taicho at my house. Soul Society was finally having a quiet spell, with no rogue Shinigami or Hollows or Quincy or anything for that matter. Just the normal level of Hollows with the rare Menos Grande showing up once in a blue moon. So, I was slightly curious about the reason for his presence. I had run into him a few times in Karakura, but not usually during the day, and certainly not at my house. I knew that he and Karin were on friendly terms, because I had seen them talking a couple times. However, Karin was at school, and I knew that he knew it. Blame me for having my curiosity piqued.

"Yo, Toshiro. What's up with you?"

The shorter boy had a twitch in his eye. "That's Hitsu- Never mind. It's not like either you or Kurosaki will ever actually listen."

I settled for raising an eyebrow. The stuck-up, bossy Taicho not whining about calling him by his proper title? That was a first. I was still observing him. He looked like he was in his teens now, probably the same age as Karin. Although he wasn't as much of a midget anymore. Now, he just looked like a short high schooler, rather than an elementary school kid. But that slight frown on his face was the same one I was used to seeing.

"Kurosaki? Oi!"

I realized he had finally stopped mumbling. "Yeah, I'm listening. What mess is Soul Society in this time, for you to show up on my doorstep?"

"There's nothing wrong with Soul Society."

Oh? That was a surprise. But, that still didn't explain his presence. "Then, Toshiro, to what the hell do I owe your visit?"

"Kurosaki. You owe my visit to Kurosaki."

"Karin? What did she do?" I knew she was spiritually-aware, and a handful, but what on earth did she manage to do that had the Juubantai Taicho showing up?

"I'm going to be busy for the next few days with some things in Soul Society. So, I came today to drop this off."

He pulled a small box from inside his jacket. It was about the size of his palm, and carefully wrapped. He held it out to me, and I took it from him. Whatever it was, it was slightly heavy for its size.

"And what am I supposed to do with this?"

He glanced to the side and mumbled something unintelligible. One look at my face probably told him that I didn't catch whatever he said. He let out a sigh, characteristic of him.

"Could you just give it to her tomorrow? She was really upset with me when I missed her birthday two years ago. And I don't fancy being punched again. It hurts when I'm in a gigai." He muttered that last bit.

It finally made sense to me, why he showed up at a time when Karin was not home. And I could say I understood his sentiments. After all, I had taught Karin to punch. I knew how hard she could hit. I simply shrugged.

"Sure, I'll give it to her." Then, a thought crossed my mind. "It had better not be something stupid, Toshiro. I will personally end you, otherwise."

"For Kami's sake, Kurosaki!"

I shut the door in the face of a sputtering Taicho with a signature vein pulsing on his temple. Sheesh, for someone with an ice-type Zanpakuto, he really needed to cool down.

When I gave Karin her birthday hug and hair-ruffle, I whispered to her, "There's a present from one of your friends on my desk. The idiot couldn't come because of work. Just tell me if I need to kill him."

Karin was surprised, but grinned. "Sure will, Ichi-nii!"

On the evening of Karin and Yuzu's birthday, I went to their room to put away a few presents when I saw something on Karin's desk that wasn't there earlier. There, towards the wall, stood a small crystal ornament. A figurine of a girl in mid-kick, her foot in contact with a soccer ball. On closer inspection, I realized that what looked like crystal was actually ice. Ice that didn't seem to melt.

I left the room, silently admitting that Toshiro actually came up with a good gift that I wouldn't have to murder him for.

* * *

A knock sounded on my door, and a familiar dark head poked in. "Hey, Ichi-nii?"

I shut my laptop and put it to a side. "Come on in. What happened?"

Karin shuffled in, and shut the door behind her. She sat down on the edge of my bed, putting a pillow in her lap, the way she did when she was younger. She seemed oddly uncomfortable about something. I was starting to get worried now.

"Karin?"

"Uhhh..." She leaned over to pluck my phone from the nightstand, and started a random playlist, without even looking. Then, she turned the volume up all the way, and put the phone back. I was confused enough by now. She was making no sense.

"I-Ichi-nii? How do you, um, know if someone, you know, likes you?"

(The blaring music suddenly made sense. No eavesdropping possible.)

My jaw went slacker than it did when I found out that Orihime had actually liked me the whole time. If I considered that as 'Most Improbable Scenario Number Two', then this was definitely 'Most Improbable Scenario Number One'. Karin, rough and tumble, fiery, tomboyish Karin, was asking me about the L-word. Kami-sama help me. I suddenly had a rather awful thought.

"Karin, no one tried to do anything to you, right? I mean, you're not taking anything in the wrong way-"

I was cut off by the pillow hitting my face.

"Damn it, Ichi-nii! I'm not dumb. I'm sixteen! I know what classifies as rude and perverted!"

Karin was flushed and maybe it was from anger or embarrassment or both. Either way, that pacified me. Taking a deep breath, I wondered how to tackle this new problem. While I was thinking, I heard her mumble something so quietly, that I almost missed it over the loud music.

"Besides, it's more like what he didn't do."

Her dejected expression sealed it. I stretched out and pulled Karin to me, the way I did when she was much younger, and she cuddled into my side while I ruffled her hair.

"Okay, kiddo. First off, which brat do I need to kill?"

I got a snort and a half-hearted "Ichi-nii!" for that. Well, atleast that down in the dumps expression was gone.

"Fine, being serious now. So, tell me, do you really like this guy? I mean, it's not a passing fancy?"

She nodded. "I guess so. I think if it was a fancy, it would have passed a few years ago."

I mentally winced. A few years? That long, and I had no clue? Owch.

"So, basically, you want to know if he likes you, but you aren't sure. And you definitely like him."

Another nod. Another mental wince.

"I'm not the best person for this kind of thing, Karin. I don't know, just try dropping a few hints?"

Something about Karin's expression told me she'd tried dropping a couple hints. This time, I had to fight not to visibly wince.

"You already tried, haven't you?" Nod. I sighed.

"Either he's trying to spare your feelings, if he's one of the decent guys and doesn't like you. Or he's a pig and is having fun at your expense but I'm pretty damn sure you'd have wiped the floor with him if that were the case. Or he's anything like me, that is, the painfully oblivious kind. So, the best solution would be to just flat out ask him. That's what Orihime had to do in the end, because I was too dense to get all the hints she'd been dropping for almost three years. Honestly, if she hadn't sprung that on me, I don't think we'd ever have gotten round to dating."

"You really think I should do that, Ichi-nii?"

It was at times like this that I was reminded that behind the 'I-don't-care' attitude, Karin was still my baby sister, who was terrified at times, and looked up to 'Ichi-nii' for help. And I made a mental note to give this mystery guy hell for putting Karin through this.

"I'm just giving you a suggestion. In the end, it's your judgement. Although, you can count on me to deal with the brat if he hurts you in any way."

She grinned at me. "I'll keep that in mind."

She got up to leave when a thought popped into my mind.

"Oi, Karin. Remember that condition you once told me about your future boyfriend? About how he had to be able to beat you at soccer? What happened to that?"

What happened next had me gaping. Karin was sporting a rather deep blush. Yes. She was blushing. She darted out of the door after squeaking (SQUEAKING) something that sounded suspiciously like

"Condition fulfilled."

Just... WHAT THE HELL?!

* * *

It was a few weeks later that Toshiro showed up at the house again. I looked up from the news to see Karin and Toshiro walking in, a little before dinner.

"Yo, Karin. Toshiro."

"Hey, Ichi-nii." Toshiro nodded at me, and got a kick to the shins. "Evening, Kurosaki."

My eyes just about widened. That was the politest greeting I'd ever gotten from the icy prodigy. Well, Karin basically forced it out of him, but it was a surprise all the same.

Dinner was the usual affair. Noisy and rambunctious. After dinner, I went up to my room, deciding to read for a while. I had barely settled down when I heard knocking.

"Come in."

Karin stepped in, followed by Toshiro. My first instinct was that Soul Society messed up again, and somehow managed to pull Karin into it this time. Or maybe they just messed up, and Karin decided to step in herself. She had been training somewhat with Urahara and Yoruichi, even going to Orihime sometimes. And I had taught her Shunpo, just in case. She didn't have a Zanpakuto, but was decent at Kido. So, I wouldn't have been that stunned if she decided to involve herself in whatever was going on.

While I was mulling over all this, Karin nudged Toshiro. "Come on, get on with it. He won't kill you."

That caught my attention. Why would I have to kill Toshiro, if I may know?

Said white-haired Taicho cleared his throat. And then, that stiff, stuck-up, condescending KID bent over in a formal bow. I was still trying to comprehend this when he started speaking.

"Kurosaki, I want to make a humble request. I may not be the best person in your opinion, but I'm asking you to consider this."

He straightened, and looked me directly in the eye, his gaze determined and unwavering. My brain was trying to make sense of what the HELL ever was going on and why in Kami-sama's name was HITSUGAYA TOSHIRO bowing to me and spouting stuff like that.

"Please allow me to court your sister, Karin."

No. No way. No freaking way was this happening.

(A random thought popped up at the back of my mind. Who even used the word 'court' nowadays?)

I gathered my bearings enough to take in the situation. Toshiro's eyes were determined, but there was a hint of fear and uncertainty there. And also a glimmer of hope. Karin's expression also betrayed a hint of uncertainty and hope and something like 'pleasepleasepleaseIchi-nii'. Realization came crashing down on me like a full-powered Getsuga Tensho.

Karin had a crush on Hitsugaya Toshiro. Toshiro was the damn idiot she had been talking about that day. Toshiro was the guy who managed to beat KARIN at soccer. And from the look of things, I'd say that the crush was reciprocated enough. My first instinct was 'NO'. Just no. Not happening. Toshiro can burn in hell. But Karin's expression was just begging me to say yes. And then, the overprotective elder brother part of my brain gave way to logic and I concluded that things could be a lot worse.

Toshiro wasn't a bad guy; I would go so far as to say he was actually decent. I knew he was powerful enough (Captain of the Tenth Division explained that part). He could take care of Karin from the Spiritual World as well as in normal life. Although, Karin was more than equipped to take care of herself, but he was an added reassurance. Also, he was built sturdy enough to handle Karin. (NOT in the perverted way, DAMMIT. If he so much as thought about 'handling' her right now, I would go all-out on him. Bankai. Hollow Mask. The works. Karin's crush be damned.)

And if Toshiro was going to continue dropping by, then that gave me opportunities to fluster the kid. I was starting to like the look of things. And I think I had tortured those two enough by now. Besides, Orihime would never forgive me if I refused. And I could always 'take care' of Toshiro if needed to. (The brat was powerful, but I could still flatten him.)

I set my face into a blank mask and narrowed my eyes at the boy. To his credit, he didn't flinch.

"Karin, I hope you remember our agreement. That offer always stands. Okay?"

I glanced at Karin, to see the first traces of understanding dawning on her. I internally smirked.

"Toshiro, you hurt her and I will go Bankai on you. Juubantai Taicho or not."

I picked up my book and settled back against the headboard. "Out with you, I'm trying to read in peace."

I glanced up. Both of them were still rooted to the spot, stunned expressions on their faces. I sighed.

"Why they call you a prodigy, I don't understand. 'Court' her. Date her. Go out with her. Take care of her. And get the hell out of my room before I change my mind."

Both of them jerked to their senses and practically bolted from the room. I smirked to myself. Idiots.

* * *

I had gone down to the kitchen to get a glass of water. While going back to my room, I crossed Karin's room and heard voices in there. I paused outside the door to listen to the rather loud conversation going on.

"But why? Why do I have to do this, Karin?"

"Come on, Toshiro! It's not that much!"

"This is a freaking pain!"

"Can't you even do that much for me? It's just for a couple hours! I'm not even asking you to attend the whole event."

"Karin, please. Don't make me do this."

By now, my curiosity had been piqued. What could be so important to Karin and so torturous for Toshiro? In all the time they dated, I had grown fond of the kid. He made Karin happy, and he smiled a lot more around her. And he went incredibly out of his way for her. So, what could be so daunting for Hitsugaya Toshiro?

The conversation had moved ahead, but the gist had stayed the same in all my wondering.

"Fine, Toshiro. You leave me no choice."

"W-What do you mean, Karin?"

"I'm sorry."

"D-Don't tell me you're b-breaking up with me over this?"

This sounded like a bad soap opera, but I was too curious to leave. And a tiny part of me was actually shocked. This couldn't possibly be bad enough for Karin to break up with him. Although, Toshiro stuttering made me realize just how much he cared for Karin, if he was this upset. I might be feeling just a little bit bad for him.

"No, idiot! I'm not going to break up with you over something like this!"

Toshiro audibly sighed in relief. I raised an eyebrow. What was that scamp planning, if she wasn't dumping him?

"Hitsugaya Toshiro. I'm giving you one last chance. EIther you agree to take me to the school dance, or..."

"O-Or?"

"Or I'll tell Ichi-nii that you broke my heart and I might drop him a hint to go use the Tenth Division Barracks as his own personal training ground. And I know how much you love the extra paperwork."

Outside the door, my face cracked into a grin. My respect for Karin just shot up. As I walked away to my room, for a second, I wondered if I should be more worried about Toshiro or Karin.

"Kurosaki Karin, may I please have the honour to escort you to the dance?"

Yeeeeaaahhhh, both of them can handle each other just fine.

* * *

The next week, when I found Toshiro outside my window in a tuxedo, I was more surprised at the tuxedo part, rather than the window part.

"Um, can you help me with this?"

He held out a piece of white cloth to me, and pointed to his collar.

(The Orihime inside my mind was squealing. "Aww, Toshiro-kun doesn't know how to tie a bowtie. How cute." Love does strange things to people. Believe me, I KNOW.)

I took it and quickly and deftly knotted it into a perfect bow. "There you go."

He glanced at himself in the mirror, checking to see if everything was alright. Then, he turned to me. He was oddly nervous, but I guess that was to be expected. What I didn't expect were the next words out of his mouth.

"Thanks, Ichi-nii."

I gawked at him for a few moments, while his face darkened with a blush. Suddenly, I grinned widely and threw an arm around Toshiro, while my other fist ruffled his already-messy hair.

"Gah! Get off off me!"

I was going to have so much fun with these two.

* * *

 **A.N. Hey people! I know, I have no respect for deadlines. Please don't kill me. I probably won't be able to write much until July, so bear with me. Anyway, I hope you liked my take on Ichigo's take on HitsuKarin. Reviews are welcome. Flames are okay. I appreciate the response, and any ideas you would like to share, or anything you'd like me to write. T rated, please.**


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